nobody steals from girl scouts

I miss Lemon Pastry Cremes. And when Peanut Butter Patties were still called Peanut Butter Patties, not Tagalongs. What the hell does that mean?

But anyway, I heard a story on the news today, about a guy who robbed a Girl Scout troop outside Safeway. She was an older Girl Scout, like 16, but still – IT’S HORRIBLE. Apparently, it was some short ginger with a goatee in his twenties. At least it’s more descriptive than an average height male in his thirties with sandy brown hair. But really? Who steals from Girl Scouts? You have to be completely desperate and heartless to do that. However, from this horrendous act came something good – the Safeway reimbursed the troop for all the money that was stolen, a radio station donated $1000 to the troop, and apparently some woman off the street gave the girl $100 after hearing about the robbery.

I bet Ginger feels pretty damn stupid now. If I were him I’d kick my own balls.

—————-

Winter quarter is ALMOST over. I have two finals next week, but classes are over. THANK GOD. I was ready to be done with Creative Nonfiction halfway through the quarter. That might be why this quarter seemed so long. But I did have an interesting last day of class. We planned this stupid potluck for thursday; people brought veggies, doughnuts, baklava, and we had nachos. I was in charge of cheese. So I got to the office early, heated up the cheese in the crock pot, and got to class a couple minutes late. I wasn’t about to run across campus with a crock pot full of hot nacho cheese. I opened the door to class, and everyone clapped.

“For the cheese? Well we can’t have nachos without cheese.”

“The cheese too, but no! For this!” And Rachel pointed to the class publication.

Oh right, that thing that I spent hours on. I better get some fucking extra credit for doing that. Beaufort even said it was the best class publication we’ve had yet. Well…duh. I designed it. (LOL the Libertines song “Narcissist” just came on my itunes as I wrote that.) So everyone loved it – except MICHAEL, because his name isn’t ROBERT. I’ll explain. His name is Robert Michael, but he goes by his middle name in class. But I don’t care enough to pay attention, so I just followed what it said on his email, which is ROBERT MICHAEL. How the hell was I supposed to know that he went by his middle name? Oh well. I’m just glad to get out of that class, with all Beaufort’s crazy ass oil pastels, arbitrary grading techniques, and my classmates endless ramblings about either having children at a young age or going to Iraq. I’ve heard it all. I don’t really care anymore.

This was basically my attitude all throughout this quarter:

I just colorized this old photo for my mom to use for a flyer for her store. I like it a lot.

What else?

Oh! I’m heading to Mountlake Terrace High School tomorrow for the WJEA State Convention to judge. I have no idea what I’m judging yet, because Fern never got back to me. I should probably figure that out before I go tomorrow. Jesse Jones is the keynote speaker tomorrow, which I’m actually quite excited for. “Jesse Jones, King 5 News!” But it gets over pretty early in the afternoon, so I’m thinking I’m gonna take a little detour to Seattle on the way home and chill for awhile. There are certain things that I have to do that I haven’t done yet. I’ve never been to Elliott Bay Bookstore (I know, it’s horrible), Easy Street OR Sonic Boom, or Dick’s. Commence with the finger-wagging. But that reminds me – I just found out that the Morning Benders are going to play a free acoustic in-store at Sonic Boom on April 2nd before their show at the Crocodile (their 21+ show). I love them so much I might just drive up to see them. Plus, I have to buy Big Echo, and I’d rather not order it online. And I surely won’t be able to get it anywhere but Seattle.

I almost forgot. I was going to try and stop by the convention center, cause it’s Emerald City Comic-Con tomorrow. I can’t get into anything, but it would still be pretty fun walking around the place. And Leonard Nimoy’s gonna be there. Alexis is gonna go apeshit. It is Leonard Nimoy, after all.

—————————

BEHOLD THE GAGA.

I watched this video this morning, and I didn’t know if I loved it or if I was disgusted with it. But it surely is something to be ogled at. I hate all the product placement though.

OH MY GOODNESS I ALMOST FORGOT.

I haven’t written about American Idol since last year’s finale, but last night was blasphemous enough to make me write about it here. If you don’t really care for AI, avert your eyes and finish watching “Telephone.”

I first have to say how much I hate Kara Dioguardi. She makes me want to…ugh…what’s really bad? Oh, she makes me want to rob a Girl Scout! She is such an attention whore. She just HAS to bring everything back to her. When any of the contestants have sang a song that she wrote, she is always, “when I wrote that song I was thinking about how much this guy….BLAH BLAH BLAH I’M STARVED FOR ATTENTION.” This week she made it even worse, even worse than when she got all hot and bothered after Casey’s first performance (you know, the pretty one?). Wednesday she fucking CRIED after Michael’s performance – the only man of color in the final 12. He said Kate Bush’s “A Woman’s Work,” and she was bawling. I wanted Simon to stab her with his pen right there. Or Ryan to kick her in the head. But that wasn’t what I came to rant about.

The top 12 is bullshit this year. Sure, it’s ten white people and two black people, and that’s it, but three out of the four people who got sent home this week didn’t deserve to.

Katelyn Epperly was bland and inconsistent, so she needed to go.
Todrick Hall had one of the best performances on wednesday with “Somebody to Love,” and I was sure that all the love that Glee has given that song would put him into the top 12, but no. America is stupid,
Lilly Scott was the only one who was consistent and completely sure about what kind of artist she was going to be. And she could sing, with a distinct voice, and she was really cool. She played a gazillion instruments – INCLUDING A MOOG. It really pissed me off that she went home.
Alex Lambert was freaking adorable. Okay, I wanted to chop the mullet off, and he needed a little time to gain more confidence, but he had so much potential and one of the best and most distinct voices there. His departure made me genuinely sad, because he was such a sweet and talented kid.

In my opinion these people should have gone home:

Paige Miles had the WORST performance this week, and she can’t pick a good song for shit. She had a voice, I’ll give her that, but she has no style and no consistency, and no personality.
Aaron Kelly is still getting used to his post-pubescent voice. I like the kid – he’s cute enough, and the country people need something in the top 12, because Haeley Smiles-Alot went home last week (THANK GOD I COULDN’T STAND THAT WHITE BLACK GIRL). It’s only fair for the country fans, but he needs time to grow into his voice. He’s going to struggle in the top 12, guaranteed.
Lee Dewyze needed to go home because as much as Simon seems to love him (I have no idea why), he isn’t special at all. For one thing, he has a shitty taste in music. Last week he said Hinder’s “Lips of an Angel,” which is perhaps one of the worst songs ever, and this week he did a heavier guitar-laden version of “Fireflies” by Owl City. Where the hell does he get his taste? From bad adult-alt radio. Apparently none of the judges listen to anything but pop radio, but Lee’s voice is like EVERY OTHER rock-lite band out there. Hinder, Shinedown, Nickelback, Theory of the Deadman, 3 Doors Down – they all suck ass. He’s a nice enough-looking guy, and I can understand why America likes him, because America likes Nickelback, but that doesn’t make it good.

Ugh. I’m really angry with this final 12. Crystal Bowersox better kick some ass. And Lacey Brown better figure out what kind of songs she wants to sing, and Siobhan Magnus better stay awesome. Andrew Garcia better get his shit together and pick some good songs, because the judges have been picking him apart these last few weeks. Other than that – I was glad that Tim Urban made it into the top 12, because he worked really hard to get there, and he did a bang-up job on “Hallelujah” on wednesday. It takes some balls to do that song, especially cause the judges were giving him such shit up until then. Ellen even got up on stage and gave him a hug. “I have to do this,” she gets out of her seat and rushes up to the stage, “that was fanTAStic!” And she hugged him. I was adorable. And he’s quite adorable too.

There’s a rabbit living in our yard. I left a carrot out for it earlier, and Millie started chasing after it when I let her and Lucy out to pee. Naturally, Lucy hasn’t been able to focus on anything other than sniffing out that rabbit when I take her outside. She’s easily distracted. But she’ll be here until tomorrow, so she’ll be sleeping in my bed tonight. I swear, I’m her second favorite person in the whole wide world. And she’s my second favorite dog in the whole wide world, although sometimes I like her more than Millie.

They’re both sleeping on the floor. It’s adorable.

Goodnight.

❤ Abby

I started a Tumblog!

It’s right here. I kind of haven’t really stopped posting there for the last day and a half, cause it’s so much quicker than posting here, but you can include more things than on Twitter. Tumblr’s like a blog mixed with twitter. So I figured I should make myself present in the Tumblr world, cause where do I not exist on the internet? WordPress, Facebook, Youtube, Twitter, Myspace, Last.fm, Flickr, and now Tumblr. I’ve titled it “This Is A Tangent 2.0,” because I’m not creative. And it will include these posts as well as short lil’ bits of goodness, like videos, pictures, quotes, links, and SONGS. We can upload audio to Tumblr and have them play right there. It’s pretty cool.

This week has started out exponentially better than last week. Well, apart from “Rules Don’t Stop” not being played on Zane Lowe’s show on BBC radio this morning, today’s pretty alright. I didn’t feel like shit waking up, I have the easiest homework this week, and we watched a badass movie in my film class today. Check this sexy mofo –

Seriously, is Johnny Depp never not hot? Okay, Willy Wonka wasn’t sexy, but every other time, he’s so pretty. And Dead Man was by far the craziest movie we’ve watched in my Western class to date. It started out slow, and Crispin Glover was all creepy like he always is, and Johnny Depp saw a whore blowing a guy in an alley in this town called Machine, and he killed a guy, got shot, then an Indian came and rescued him and took him hella West. I mean, as pretty freaking West as you can get – Pacific Ocean West. Iggy Pop and Billy Bob Thornton were some mountain dudes who wanted to kill Johnny Depp, and Alfred Molina was a Christian dude who ran the trading post and all this happened in 90 minutes. You should watch it. Neil Young did the soundtrack, and it’s ace. Like, one of the coolest soundtracks I’ve ever heard.

That’s a nice segue, music!

I’ve been listening to a lot of The Automatic the last day or so, after seeing this project that one of my many internet friends, Polly has done. She gets college credit for this. Seriously. I vote that you go take a look at her pictures, and listen to this band:

What else?

Oh, I bought my Sasquatch ticket. But that’s only to cover my ass in case I happen to not get my press credentials, which then I’ll be sad and cry.

I should move my car, wait, no. Not now. Then I’ll get another ticket. Keep it in the garage, Abby. Don’t move it. I’ll do homework. Right, my feature story final draft is due tomorrow. Way to go me for recycling an old story idea. Half-assing is so much easier that way.

Hopefully tomorrow Zane Lowe will play “Rules Don’t Stop.” I’ve been major jonesing for new WAS lately. And I’m sure that any of my friends who doesn’t listen to WAS are tired of hearing about them. But I DON’T CARE. I love them that much.

Cheers.

❤ Abby

LOST, you got some ‘splaining to do!

I haven’t done a TV post in a while. Well, besides Doctor Who.

But yesterday was the beginning of the end. No, it’s not 2012 yet, the Reckoning has not come.

Season 6 of Lost started last night. I just watched the premiere today, and it was superb. I vote that one mystery is solved per episode. At least one mystery, cause lord knows there’s more mysteries than episodes this season. I’ll try not to be too spoilery, but some might slip out.

But the reason for this post isn’t to recap the season premiere, because that’d be annoying and I still wouldn’t be able to explain it enough for anyone to remotely understand. If you don’t watch Lost, stop reading if you haven’t already…in that case you wouldn’t be reading this sentence. …

Anyway, I’ve been watching Lost since the beginning. And I’ve had my times of confusion, sure, but the show’s never been crap. Which is something I can’t say for other shows *coughHeroesGrey’sAnatomycough.* So stop hating. Lost rocks. And there will be hole in our television lineup once it’s gone. You can’t deny it. Obviously people care enough to try to understand what the hell is going on.

That said, this last season has a lot to accomplish. Seriously. J.J. Abrams, Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof, if you don’t knock this out of the park, excuse the cliche, then we’re going to hate you. It’ll be the worst let down ever. I would have wasted 6 years of my life following this show. So I’ve compiled a list of things that you need to clear up. At least the things I can remember. These are in no particular order.

1. What the hell happened to Claire?

We know that Aaron’s all good now, but after she went all bonkers when Christian was in the jungle, she disappeared. That brings me to number two.

2. Does Christian Shephard actually exist in the present (or is he all ghosty in Jack’s head)?

I, for one, am totally creeped out by Jack’s visions of his father, but in the Island’s infinite power, did Christian come back to life like Locke could walk again? And does the fact that the airlines “lost” Christian’s body (this is revealed in the alternate history explored in the premiere) have anything to do with his existence/nonexistence?

3. I know a revelation about the Smokey Dragon Thing happened in the premiere, but I need more!

I’m serious. It makes clicking noises and grabs people in a cartoony way, so what the hell is it??!

4. A little abstract, but are Jack and Sawyer brothers?

I remember at one point there were hints of this, but the writers never explored the idea more. Since then, I’ve been looking for clues that they may or may not be. I know it had something to do with their dads.

5. Why does Richard never age? Does he time travel? Or is it REALLLLLY good botox?

I’m just wondering. It’s not all that essential, I just wanna know.

6. Why is Desmond special when it comes to time travel?

Faraday, you’re responsible for answering some questions, yet confusing us even more. Why don’t the rules apply to Desmond? Why can he change the future, but no one else? You had to die before answering my questions, didn’t you Faraday?

7. Who the crap has been whispering in the woods for all this time?

Another of the creepy aspects of Lost has never gone away, yet never really been explained. Someone tried transcripting them, but that doesn’t really mean anything. Is it the Island? Is it their subconscious? Is it God? And if it was the Others like some say, what the heck do they say and why not explain it fully?

8. Walt. Why is Walt so significant? I know he is, but I just don’t know how!

We’ve been following this kid sporadically since the beginning, and we know that Michael’s dead, and they explained Michael’s reconnection with the Island, but Locke kept seeing Walt in the jungle, which was hella creepy. ARE YOU AN ANGEL, WALT?

9. What made all the babies die?

That’s the whole reason Juliet came to the Island, but they never explained why the mothers and children died when they conceived their children on the Island.

10. How did the Island get there in the first place? And why the hell does it do all the crazy stuff it does?

This is a pretty all-encompassing question, but come on, this is what we’re all wondering.

I did notice this though today when I watched the premiere – is the number 108 significant? The Oceanic 6 were on the Island 108 days before getting rescued, and the button had to be pushed every 108 minutes so the Swan station wouldn’t malfunction, or whatever.

Oh, and the goddamn polar bear. I’m guessing it got stuck their when the Island got all dislodged in time and space, like when Ben jumped into the Arctic after he spun the wheel. I just wanna know.

I WANNA KNOW EVERYTHING! It was sure nice to see Charlie in the premiere though in all those alternate history sequences, and Boone. Damn he was hot.

❤ Abby

the grammys are like the lame relative that still uses cassette tapes and dial-up

And every other recognition in music up-to-date, at least using CDs and wireless internet.

Okay, that may have been a lame analogy, but I went and checked the list of the Grammy nominations this morning just to refresh my memory for tomorrow’s awards. Sorry, Grammys, but you’re out of touch. You’ve become lamer and lamer for the last few years, but this year you’ve succumbed to record sales. I swear it’s like the record execs are blowing all the Grammy voters.

Record of the Year:
Halo – Beyonce
Poker Face – Lady Gaga
You Belong with Me – Taylor Swift
Use Somebody – Kings of Leon
I Gotta Feeling – Black Eyed Peas

It’s almost as if the Grammys are morphing into the VMAs, or the other less prestigious awards, only with way more completely unneeded categories. So many flipping categories.

Not to say that some of these nominations are deserved, but just because a song is catchy and played all over the telly doesn’t mean it’s good. If Taylor Swift or Black Eyed Peas win record of the year, I’ll be pissed. Just as long as one of the other three win. And Best New Artist? Grammys, you need to up your indie cred by a gazillion percent. Three of the nominated bands came out with their album a long while ago. Ting Tings – May of 2008. MGMT – Oct. 2007 and Jan. 2008. Silversun Pickups – okay, they released Swoon in 09, but they released Carnavas in 06, and Pikul on 05. For crying out loud, THEY’RE NOT NEW! They may only be new to you Grammy voters, but “Lazy Eye” was actually kind of a hit back in 2006. Wake up, Grammys.

But what’s worse – nay, in fact HORRIFYING – this is the list for best hard rock performance:
War Machine – AC/DC
Check my Brain – Alice in Chains
What I’ve Done – Linkin Park
The Unforgiven III – Metallica
Burn in to the Ground – Nickelback…

…NICKELBACK!??!

WHAT?!?!

Wow, Grammys, you really fucked up this one. Do you honestly think people are going to take you seriously after that? The fact that “1901” isn’t up for record of the year is terrible enough.

I was confused after hearing how ridiculous these nominations were, so I wikipedia’d the Grammy nomination process. I’d rather not explain it myself, so I’ll just CTRL+C.

Record companies and individuals may submit recordings to be nominated. The entries are entered online and then a physical copy of the product must be sent to the National Academy of Recording Arts and Sciences. Once a work is entered, reviewing sessions are held by over 150 experts from the recording industry. This is done only to determine whether or not a work is eligible or entered into the proper category for official nomination. They may vote to nominate in the general field (Record of the Year, Album of the Year, Song of the Year and Best New Artist) and in no more than nine out of 30 other fields on their ballots. Only 5 acts can be nominated for each category. Following this process the votes are tabulated. The 5 recordings that earn the most votes become the nominees. There may be more than five nominees if there is a tie in the nomination process. After the nominations are announced final voting ballots are sent to Recording Academy members. They may then vote in the general field and in no more than eight of the 30 fields. Ballots are tabulated secretly by the major independent accounting firm Deloitte Touche Tohmatsu. Following the tabulation of votes the winners are announced at the Grammy Awards. The recording with the most votes in a category wins and it is possible to have a tie. Winners are presented with the Grammy Award and those who don’t win are given a medal for their nomination. Academy members in the nomination process and final voting process are to vote based upon quality alone. They are not supposed to be influenced by sales, chart performance, personal friendships, regional preferences or company loyalty. The acceptance of gifts is prohibited. Members are urged to vote in a manner that preserves the integrity of the academy. The nomination and final voting processes requires that members vote only in their fields of expertise. The eligibility period for the 2010 Grammy awards is October 1, 2008 to August 31, 2009.

That’s pretty messed up. You have to enter your album to be nominated? What if an artist doesn’t get around to entering, but they have the BEST ALBUM EVER? Again, that’s messed up. There was also a quote on the Wiki page that made me happy.

“I think the Grammys are nothing more than some gigantic promotional machine for the music industry. They cater to a low intellect and they feed the masses. They don’t honor the arts or the artist for what he created. It’s the music business celebrating itself. That’s basically what it’s all about.” – Maynard Keenan of Tool

Yes. I love it. It’s like the Grammys are just a way of keeping all the awards going to the same people. Especially with all the unnecessary categories – so people get nominated for multiple awards which technically all mean the same thing. It’s a cycle of marketing, radio play, music videos, album sales, and awards – some crazy incestuous relationship between the recording industry and the artists they represent and the voters.

This is how ridiculous the Grammys have always been – the Dixie Chicks have won more awards than the Beatles. Jimmy Sturr has won more awards than Michael Jackson. Who the eff is Jimmy Sturr? He won best polka album like 18 out of the 24 years it’s actually been a category. How fair is that?

Not fair.

Grammys, you fail.

Gaga, you better win something.

God I wish I could have seen her last year at the Showbox. No way there will be another chance to see her at a venue like that.

❤ Abby

Apparently my rough drafts are too good

I’d rather not completely change my own principle way of writing, but I might have to in order to get better than a C in my creative nonfiction writing class. I mean seriously, woman…a flipping C? Not to sound too high and mighty, but I don’t get Cs in classes strictly about WRITING. Foolish woman.

But apparently, after a pep talk from Marisa yesterday, Professor likes IMPROVEMENT. Even if I had an amazing rough draft, my second draft has to be even more amazing, and my THIRD draft has to be almost sent from heaven. I DON’T DO THIRD DRAFTS. I write a great draft, and mess with it slightly here and there. So now, against my own conscience, I have to start with a shitty draft and improve immensely from there. Seriously, if some of the papers I read got higher grades than I did because they improved more on crap than I improved on a great paper, I’m gonna smack someone. Honestly, she told me that with MINOR adjustments that this was ready for publication in the school’s lit mag. I would have submitted it if the villain in the story didn’t go to our school.

That might get awkward, even though I doubt she’d ever read Tahoma West anyway.

I’m sorry if I sound arrogant right now, but I’m pissed. Her critique was all, “this is really good, you should submit it after making a couple adjustments,” and then I get my grading sheet back and she said, “met genre requirements, perfect grammar, used craft techniques effectively, but oh, yeah…you got a C.”

WHAT?

This is a seemingly waste of a blog, but it felt like a change up from what I usually write about. Because I’m sure you’re getting tired of my ramblings about…shit I don’t even remember what I’ve been writing about lately. Oh right, Doctor Who, missing my best friend, and music. Duh. Pretty much been what most of my tweets have been about for the last two weeks.

I took Libby’s senior portraits a couple weeks ago, and I never posted any pics, but this was one of my favorites.

I just freaking love her hair in it.

And here’s one from one of Laura’s going away parties.

Miss you already. ❤

OH MY GOD.

NEW WAS.

HOLY BALLSACK.

I wish I could embed this video, but Facebook doesn't want me too, and this guy hasn't uploaded it to Youtube yet.

Here's the link, nonetheless.

And here’s Nobody Move at Johnny Brenda’s in Philly two nights ago. I just wish that Laura could go to the WAS show in Hoboken tomorrow night.

Oh, and here’s a show roundup from What’s the Word, including twitter pics and a link to a review and some better pictures. Philly Show Roundup. Damn Keith is looking good. One more thing to look forward to in May. Holy crap May is going to be the most amazing month EVER.

Hmm, what else?

Hello Thomas Mars. I get to see you again tomorrow.

You I get to see you, Laurent.

And you Deck.

You too, Christian!

And since I won’t be in the pit with time constraints and hopefully no smoke machine, my pics will be amazing. Here’s hoping. And to meet them. That would be fantastic.

And just cause, some David Tennant picspam.




And a bonus of Tennant and Cribbins at the NTAs the other day that Susie posted on the WAS board yesterday. So heartwarming.

Screw my new sign-off, it’s tedious.

❤ Abby

I miss Skins. :(

With all my television shows on the air now – trust me, there are a lot – there is still one show that I wished lasted longer than 10 episodes.

Remember this bunch?

Then last year’s all-new cast?

Well, Skins is coming back for a 4th series in January. Thank god. But E4 would be dense if they didn’t bring back the ultimate guilty pleasure. I mean, come on. I’d so much prefer the promiscuous bunch from Bristol than the NY socialite bitches on Gossip Girl. Today, I had such a hankerin’ for some Skins, I searched the Wiki to see if there was any new info on series 4. Not much since the photo surfaced from a few weeks ago, but I did find this lil’ tidbit:

In May 2009, E4 confirmed that Film4 and Company Pictures are in “preliminary talks” about a movie spin-off.[7] It is unknown which of the cast members would be featured, or where the film will fit in the show’s continuity, leading to a possibility that both generations of characters will meet. A novel is also being produced and set to be released January 7, 2010. The novel will take place in between Series 3 and Series 4.[8][9] MTV announced they will adapt Skins to American television. The U.S. version will be filmed in Baltimore with an unknown cast, despite the already-negative attitude towards a remake.[4]

Okay, it’s not a “lil'” tidbit, but it’s a big fucking pile of NO. Well, the movie spin-off wouldn’t be a bad idea, because I miss Maxxie and Anwar and Tony and Sid, but MTV, why must you destroy everything? And plus, the FCC would never let MTV get away with anything remotely close to Skins. And with how goddamn PC this country is and how sheltered people like their children nowadays, it just wouldn’t be good. No, Skins. Don’t give up the format. DON’T DO IT. If American television had the balls, they’d just import the show. Not try to take everything cool away from it and Americanize it.

But I’m upset that series 4 will only have 8 episodes. Really? 8 episodes? Balls.

Hoping the Inbetweeners come back too. That show was funny. A nice comic relief after the heavy drama of Skins. Oh well, I’m just SUPER EXCITED that WAS is having their own television show in the UK. How sick is that? TWO OF MY FAVORITE THINGS IN ONE – I THINK I’M GONNA E’SPLODE!

❤ Abby

Testing…testing…

Don’t Stop Believin’ (Glee Cast Version) by abbigshmail

I wanted to test out this Soundcloud thing with a song that Libby hasn’t stopped playing on the piano lately, and I love it. Seriously, Lea Michele (Rachel) is like a young Idina Menzel, and for some reason Cory Monteith (Finn) reminds of a guy I went to high school with. Only the guy I went to high school with wasn’t in Glee, he was in other nerdy clubs.

Anyway. This post wasn’t merely for testing Soundcloud. School just started. Well, school started on thursday for me at least. So far, I’m okay with my classes. One of my professors from last quarter walked into my first class to borrow chairs at the beginning of class on thursday, and it made me sad, because his class was the one class I REALLY wanted to get into. But that’s okay. That’s not the class that I’m weary about.

That’s my literature class. Yes, I’m in another literature class, but hopefully it won’t be as intense as Sharkey’s last quarter. It’s women’s lit, and there are 2 guys in the class. Ha. Ha. Actually, it’s not that funny. I walked into class 2 minutes late the first day, and I had quite a surprise awaiting me once I arrived.

Open door.

Surprise!

Oh shit.

Yeah, I was hoping I’d avoid the situation all throughout these last two years of UWT, but alas, there it is – staring me right in the face the first day of classes junior year. Ugh.

I still need to get my books for that class too. That’s reminds me.

I’m keeping my fingers crossed for a good quarter. And even more publicity for Popwreckoning.

Oh! I must mention what miraculous things happened this week after the Natalie Portman’s Shaved Head show on monday. And these were quite miraculous, I’ll tell you. So I posted the review on tuesday, right? I tweeted a couple times reminding people to read it, including @NPSH and @ladyhawkeforyou in the tweets to get more people to read it. Well lo and behold, late that night Natalie Portman’s Shaved Head themselves, or whomever updates the Twitter page regularly – I think it’s Luke – read my review.

Yep.

And they tweeted me back. In these exact words. – “@abbigshmail You ruuule! That was a great review of the show. See you again sometime!”

I really do hope I see them again sometime soon. Maybe I can overcome my jitters and interview a band. HOLY SHIT THAT WOULD BE AMAZING. Whoa, I’m getting ahead of myself.

Needless to say, when I saw this I got off my couch, jumped up and down, spun around and squealed frantically. This caused the dog to stare at me like, “what the dickens is wrong with you?” I didn’t care how much of a fool I looked like. It was A-MAZING. I hadn’t imagined THAT to happen, but it did. Yeah, it was pretty sweet.

What else came from my last blog was also quite incredible. On our dashboard on WordPress, it shows where people clicked on links to your blog from. Now, there were two facebook profiles that I didn’t know on my list of “referrers.” I clicked on them, wondering how they might have come upon my blog.

And guess what?

You know Plaid Guy? Well, his name’s David. And it was HIS facebook profile that my blog got pinged from, and the other guy Will who was standing behind us – his facebook was the other one. Weird, innit? I messaged both these guys wondering how to crap they found my blog. David wrote me back, saying he searched for pictures from the show, and my blog was the only thing that came up. I tried it out, Googled “npsh showbox” and narrowed it down to blogs. And “This Is A Tangent” was the first result. Huh.

Not only did someone from the show ping my post, but the TWO DUDES STANDING BEHIND ME – WHOM I REFERRED TO IN THAT EXACT POST. That has got to be the most eerie coincidence I’ve come upon in a long time. And you thought the internet was this vast land of billions of pages. Just goes to show you how music can bring people together. And how the internet can be the vessel.

Well, I think I better get back to my reading for class on tuesday, and listening to more Glee. I swear to god even though Kristin Chenoweth’s character is kind of toxic, she should NEVER leave television. She belongs on my TV at all times. Without Pushing Daisies, Glee fulfills the brightness factor that my TV was lacking for these last 10 months.

❤ Abby

nickelback makes baby jesus cry

When I was a young lass, I’ll admit I enjoyed “How You Remind Me.” And perhaps the song “Hero” from the first Spiderman soundtrack. But then again, I used to wear skirts over jeans and couldn’t eat green vegetables without hollandaise sauce. Now I know better – steamed broccoli is delicious, skirts over jeans look utterly ridiculous, and Nickelback sucks major ass.

I’ve avoided this subject long enough, because I made myself not change the radio station when a Nickelback song came on today while I was driving home. The song was called “If Today Was Your Last Day.” Now, it sounds like a perfectly acceptable idea for a song. Living your life to the fullest, telling everyone that you love them, and bungee jumping – if that’s what you care to do before you die. But in song form, you’d figure a band would bring new ideas to the subject, eloquently and creatively addressing “your last day.”

Nope.

These are some of the lyrics. Seriously.

“Against the grain should be a way of life
What’s worth the price is always worth the fight
Every second counts ’cause there’s no second try
So live like you’re never living twice
Don’t take the free ride in your own life”
–“If Today Was Your Last Day”

Could they have included any more cliches in one stanza? They might as well have sang “carpe diem” if that’s the direction they were going.

I think I can truly say that those are some of the worst lyrics I’ve ever heard. At least “do the Helen Keller and talk with your hips” is creative. It’s retarded, but you’ve never heard someone say that before 3OH!3 sang it. Nickelback just sucks on all levels.

First of all – all the songs sound the same. Go HERE. It proves my point. There’s no hook, nothing original, nothing worth remembering, and surely nothing worth covering. At least seriously. WAS did a cover of “Rockstar,” but they did it to be ironic. And for some reason, Nickelback has slowly morphed from a late-90s pussy rock band to a late 00s douche rock band. My dad, bless his heart, actually purchased a Nickelback album a few years back – and it was the one with the dirty sexist song “Figured You Out.”

“I love your lack of self-respect
While you’re passed out on a deck.
I love my hands around your neck.”

Really? That’s disgusting. Way to fail, Nickelback.

And again, with “Animals.”

“You’re beside me on the seat
Got your hand between my knees
And you control how fast we go by just how hard you wanna squeeze
It’s hard to steer when you’re breathing in my ear
But I got both hands on the wheel while you got both hands on my gears
By now, no doubt that we were heading south
I guess nobody ever taught her not to speak with a full mouth
‘Cause this was it, like flicking on a switch
It felt so good I almost drove into the ditch”

I don’t necessarily have a problem with sexual metaphors. Lil Wayne’s “Lollipop” is outrageously blatant, but the analogies aren’t LAME. Who compares their member to gears?

Nickelback doesn’t even try to look the part anymore. At least Chad Kroeger used to have the blonde jesus/curly Cobain look back in 2001. Now in all their videos, they’re rocking tight shirts and straightened, groomed coifs. What kind of rock band is that? They look more like a country group than anything else. And I’m sure with how shallow the lyrics are – they would appeal to country fans more than rocks fans. As well as naive tweens who wouldn’t know Joe Perry even if he performed on the VMAs with Katy Perry. Oh right, he did. No 13-year-olds, Joe Perry isn’t Katy’s dad or uncle – he’s in fucking AEROSMITH.

But back to Nickelback. They’re the epitome of prepackaged, commercialized radio “rock.” It’s sad that they are the picture of what is palatable to the American mainstream. Are they even remotely popular around the world? I don’t know, but from how long they’ve been around in America, it shows that people are still buying their records. What’s the point? It’s the same shit that was on the last album. On their Wikipedia page, the genres listed are: hard rock (LOL), post-grunge (such a vague genre, but I guess it fits, because Creed is listed as post-grunge, and they suck even harder), alternative rock (no, Weezer is alternative rock. WAS is alternative rock. Nickelback is NOT alternative), and alternative metal (Tool is alt metal. Fuck you, Wikipedia.)

I feel like Wikipedia shouldn’t sugarcoat it and just describe Nickelback like they are – douche rock, commercial crap, prepackaged rock.

I know I’m not going to convince every fan that Nickelback are the Dukes of Suckingham, but I’m okay with that. Just as long as I find each and every one of them and stifle their record-buying abilities in some way, we will have won. If no one spends money on the crap, Nickelback will eventually go away into the oblivion that Creed currently rules.

Won’t that be nice?

❤ Abby

Leave it to Lady Gaga to DIE on stage

I figured since I’m SUCH a music fan, I may as well write about the VMAs last night, even though MTV has ruined so many things over the last few years.

But I must admit, bravo MTV, bravo. Last night’s awards show was awesome. It had scandal, a sexy host, some funny bits, and the performances – OH THE PERFORMANCES!

I’ll start with the scandal, because it is, of course, what everyone is talking about. This is the first and only time I can say that I was “on Taylor Swift’s side.” I don’t enjoy her music. She can’t sing live for shit, and I just don’t dig country. But she’s adorable, she writes her own songs, and she’s for sure a better role models for teenagers than Miley Cyrus who dances on poles in daisy dukes. So even I was disgusted when she went up to accept her award for Best Female Video and thank everyone, and lo and behold, here comes the duke of douchebags, Kanye West.

“Taylor, I’m happy for you, you can finish in a minute, but Beyonce had one of the best videos of ALL TIME!” And he hands her back her mic and they show Beyonce in the audience like “what the fuck is he doing? Good god I’m so much classier than he is.” Awkward pause, then cut to Tracy Morgan and Eminem’s Best New Artist bit, laugh laugh laugh, commercial, come back to Russell Brand’s sexy ass trying to keep the show going after Kanye’s head exploded with so much douche.

Thankfully, Kanye was “escorted” out of the theater after the incident. But that’s the nice way of saying that the producers kicked him and his bald-ass famewhore girlfriend out of Radio City Music Hall.

I mean, look at these whores.

Ack.

And I LOVED it whenever they announced Kanye as a nominee for anything after that, people booed. You don’t hear a lot of booing from MTV audiences, because god knows they aren’t critical of anything really, but it was fantastic. I actually booed on my couch at home. And I again clapped when Beyonce, the queen that she is, won the award for video of the year, and she brought Taylor back out to have her moment. It was so classy.

I’m just excited to see Kanye on Leno’s new show tonight, because it will be so AWKWARD. Haha, Kanye, you just lost SO many fans.

I’ll just reiterate how HOT Russell Brand looked last night. He lost the nest on the back of his head, and traded it for a top hat. In fact, he probably lent the nest to Gaga. Nevermind.

Again, I clapped after the Michael tribute. Sure, Madonna’s speech was a little weird, bringing the attention back to her in some weird way, but the mashup of all the videos and the dancers and when Janet came out and danced right next to the video of her brother, it was very cool, and very much like how MTV used to be.

Honestly, last night’s awards reminded me of back in the early 2000s before the VMAs started to suck. Having the Michael tribute open the show was the only way to do him justice after the BET Awards utterly failed at remembering him earlier this summer. Way to go, MTV. Way to go.

Something just dawned on me, I was looking through pictures from the VMAs, and do these two dresses look similar to you? >>>

Ouch. I mean, the dress is fierce, but that really sucks for both of them.

Sorry, I got sidetracked for a minute. Mom really liked the Eminem/Tracy Morgan bits about the best new artist award. But really, you put Tracy Morgan with anyone, and it’s funny. But I just love him Eminem seemed so earnest – it was hilarious. And for sure, the right person won. HELLO GAGA. And at the end – this was awesome – she ended with “this is for god and the gays!”

Eminem’s face is priceless in that picture.

How could she not win after a performance like that. Leave it to Lady Gaga to die on stage. It was fantastic. And I know some people think she’s a freak, but come on, really? If she wasn’t talented, sure you can say that. But she is so talented. And I generally don’t like pop music, but I would love to see her live. Her mashup of Poker Face and Paparazzi was one of multiple great performances of the night.

Let’s see, you’ve got Gaga.
Then Beyonce.
Green Day.
Taylor Swift (even though she was lip-syncing).
Pink.
Jay-Z with Alicia Keys.
Katy Perry’s really doesn’t count because she was introducing Russell with a Queen cover.
And MUSE!

They were all awesome and creative. Pink on a trapeze, Taylor Swift dancing in the Subway, Jay-Z and Alicia’s tribute to NYC two days after the 9/11 anniversary, Billy Joe crowd-surfed during Green Day’s performance, Beyonce had a ton of ladies doing the single ladies dance, and then there’s just Muse. You don’t even need a qualifier of why they’re awesome. But I was so pleased with the performances, like it’s kind of ridiculous how much I enjoyed it. There was no Miley to be found, people weren’t ogling over Coldplay like they did at the Grammys, and Matt & Kim won for Breakthrough Video for “Lessons Learned!”

What I loved about the Muse performance was that it wasn’t in Radio City, it was in the Walter Kerr theater across the street, a smaller theater, which meant that it was more intimate for the people watching, and those people were genuinely Muse fans, not just people who came to the VMAs to see everyone else. And at this point, I’m not so mad at Muse for possibly being on the New Moon soundtrack, because if that means they tour here more, I’m happy. Sure, I wish it was for a better movie, but at this point I’ve given up caring so much.

But I did hear the new Death Cab song “Meet Me On the Equinox,” and guess what? It’s not that good. I actually feel kind of vindicated.

It was so hilarious when Kristen Stewart, Taylor Lautner and Robert Pattinson came up on stage to introduce the “extended trailer” for New Moon. All the little chickies in the audience jizzed in their pants, and screamed their faces off. And to honest, Taylor almost looked better than RPattz last night. And Kristen’s mullet is ridiculous. And RPattz was totally drunk. He was slurring his words, whatever small amount of words he had to say.

See, SO DRUNK.

And I’m not sure whether or not that dress is working on Kristen. She needs more boobs and less mullet. And christ is she pale. Taylor looks like a completely different color palette standing next to those two translucent “lovers” as the gossip mags are calling them. Blech.

But I will say, this second movie looks way more entertaining than the first one. I’m guessing there will be less longing stares and bad makeup. I’ll probably go see it just for the laughs.

I think I’m done now. I think I’ll go listen to more Muse. <3<3<3

❤ Abby

“Where the fuck is my Tambourine?”

I’m going to halt from talking about the UWT Leadership Retreat for a bit, because honestly, last night was way crazier.

That’s Demetri Martin up there. He’s a person. And Libby and I went and saw his comedy show last night at the Moore. But it took us quite a lot to get there.

After getting home from the retreat, Mom and Libby and I bolted over to Grandma’s so I could take a shower and Mom and Dad could meet up to go to the Seahawks game. Oh, thank god they were in Seattle.

We got going right on time to our night of hilarity. It was about 7:30, and we were on Second Ave. but as we were turning on to Virginia Street – I shit you not – my car died. Like, right as I turned the corner, and stepping on the brakes a bit, it stalled, then died. I could see the Moore in front of us. Literally, it was like 200 yards away. The parking lot was…maybe 50 yards away. People started honking, but it was a one-way street, so we were lucky at least in that. Libby got out and told people to go around, because my emergency lights wouldn’t go on. We sat there for a minute, I’m freaking out, and then a few guys and this girl with pink hair helped us parallel park by pushing. Seriously. My power steering was dead, so it was really hard to turn the wheel, but we actually got it out of the road, with the help of these great people randomly on the street. One of the guys actually was at the Demetri Martin show and we saw him leaving right as we did. But as we were almost into the non parking spot, a cop pulled up behind us, and told us that he wouldn’t get us towed, because we were in a bit of a jam. But he told us that someone would eventually tow us, because we were in a no parking zone.

This is where Mom and Dad came in handy. Since Libby didn’t answer her phone, Mom and Dad drove down to the Moore to see what was up, because they’re that weird. It was 20 ’til 8 o’clock, and I was starting to think that we weren’t going to be able to go to our show, and I was really starting to freak out. Once the parentals arrived, we jumped it, and Mom and Dad told us to go to the show. Little did we know, once they got my car started again, it went merely 20 yards up the hill. Dad had to call our AAA tow truck, and they couldn’t leave the car alone, or else it would have been towed. So Mom and Dad didn’t get to go to the Seahawks game.

Thank god I didn’t know that while I was in the show, or else it would have made me feel REALLY REALLY fucking guilty. I mean, I still feel kind of guilty right now, but at least I got to enjoy the comedy show.

And it was PERFECT.

We had the same view as that photo up there ^^^^ I haven’t uploaded my pics and video because I was too tired to go find the camera cord for the new Coolpix. I’ll upload them as soon as I find the cord.

Demetri had everything from the Large Pad to the keyboard, his guitar, his harmonica, more drawings and the laser pointer, and a new part of the act that was so freaking funny. Demetri painted an army man, set him on a stool, mic’d him, and “interviewed” him by stepping on and off a voice changer to basically talk to himself. What was so perfect was the high voice his tiny man had. And his shoe had a very deep voice.

“Hey man, can you not take me off using Steve?”

“Steve?”

“Yeah, Steve, the other shoe. You just did it on stage, his face goes right into my ass.”

“I’m sorry, man. I’ll try not to do that anymore.”

“Cause we gotta hang out, like, all the time. It gets awkward.”

And picture the shoe talking in a REALLY REALLY low voice.

And speaking of awkward – Demetri did a great song about ways to end an awkward silence.

Jazz hands.

Wicka wicka wicka.

Awk-ward si-lence. CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP.

Shhh….shhh… and you touch their lips.

Those are just a few, but there were many more. I just can’t remember them at the moment. My favorite part, actually, was the random banter with the audience in the front. There was this girl celebrating her Sweet Sixteen right in front. “Happy Sweet Sixteen, how old are you?” He asked. And at one point, that same girl shouted out, “do you want to go into the bathroom with me after the show?”

“A sixteen-year-old is asking me to go to the bathroom with her.”

“There’s a keg by it.”

“There’s a keg in the bathroom?”

“No, outside the bathroom.”

“Well, that’s a good way to remind people that they have to go to the bathroom. ‘Oh look, here’s a keg…fuck I have to pee.”

And there was a woman who brought her 6-year-old to the show, Rhiannon. I’m just guessing how to spell that. It didn’t seem to stop Demetri from swearing though. It was weird hearing him swear, because he always kept it clean on Comedy Central specials and on the CD.

Speaking of swearing, that quote I used for my headline was in the encore. Demetri was talking about a point in your life when a sentence that comes out of your mouth that sums up exactly where you are in your life. And his was in his New York apartment a few years ago – “Where the fuck is my tambourine?”

Apparently he needed a tambourine.

The encore was my favorite part though, because he was taking requests for “oldies but goodies,” and just random questions. Some girl asked him to marry her, people asked a lot about the movie, Taking Woodstock, which comes out on friday, and about “Important Things,” which isn’t going to air until next spring.

However, the last two questions were asked in perfect unison from two opposite ends of the theater, which is HELLA tall, BTW. We were in the first balcony, and we already thought we were high up. The second balcony must have been in the fucking ceiling.

“What’s your favorite flavor of ice cream?”

“Where are you staying tonight?”

“My favorite flavor of ice cream is the Four Seasons.”

So funny, and so worth the frustration of a dying car battery. I was just kind of pissed that we had to leave right away afterwards, and I REALLY wanted to stand outside the theater and see if he would come out and take pictures with people. After Lindsay and I missed out on that at the Flight of the Conchords show in May, I didn’t want to miss out on it for Demetri. But sadly, my car wanted me to miss out.

Oh well, Demetri was amazing. Libby and I had a blast…ladies.

Hehe.

❤ Abby