Money doesn’t mean anything if you break your groin!

20 Feb

I’ve returned from Port Townsend, and it was nice to go away for even one day. One day to escape the homogenous society that is Gig Harbor. I need to take day trips more often, because it makes the day so much longer, even though we spent an hour and a half in the car.

My mother, my sister, her best friend Courtney and I all stayed in room 19 at the Tides Inn, the same inn from An Officer and A Gentleman, where Richard Gere and Debra Winger did the dirty-dirty and Sid killed himself. They actually have room 10 labeled the “Officer and a gentleman suite.”

Seriously.

It’s like “come stay here, Richard Gere’s sexy naked ass was in this room!” At least that’s what it seemed like when they pointed out that the “love scene was filmed in its entirety here.” It’s funny.

We couldn’t have asked for nicer weather, which was wonderful, since we walked for hours yesterday, along main street and along the beach. I spent a good long while trying to remake some shots from the movie, but 27 years of erosion changed the beach a little, and the inn had been expanded since 1982. There still was this old log on the beach that was in the movie, which was cool. It felt like the Goonie house, but cooler, because it was in Washington.

I can’t remember the name of the cafe we went to, but I had the most delectable sandwich I’d had in a long while – smoked gouda, turkey, lettuce and avocado mayonnaise on a ciabatta roll. And it was all toasted. Tasty. Tasty.

I fucking love Port Townsend. They have the coolest shops. My sister actually bought a buddha lamp, one that featured the quintessential portly buddha, only he was giving a peace sign. Bad. Ass. What was also badass was this little shop called the Writer’s Workshop next to a bead store and a yarn store. They had all these books about how to be a better writer, and little did I know, Lynne Truss made a illustrated version of Eats, Shoots and Leaves. It’s the cutest thing ever. Or maybe only I think it’s cute.

Oh, come on. Commas DO matter.

The woman that owned this store also sold t-shirts that people had made on cafepress, like “Use your words,” “Revise: you know you want to,” “Oh, this is so going in my next novel,” and other witty word-related phrases….wait, all phrases are word-related. Nevermind. Shirts for word nerds. Periodical workshops for writers and poets and such were also held in this little room. I think the woman gave me a pamphlet. I collected a lot of pamphlets yesterday. About the oldest record store in Washington, and the Port Townsend Film Festival. I’d like to go to that, because The Rose Theatre directly competes with the Orchard in Port Orchard for the award for Washington’s cutest theatre. I keep telling my mom that I want to own a old-fashioned movie theater when she gets old and I have no money. Before every film, someone comes and does a complete introduction of the film, almost reviewing it – giving blurbs from the director and other critics. Specifically, we went and saw Rachel Getting Married last night, and it was wonderful. As the woman told us before the movie started, it felt like the realist and most beautiful home movie ever. And Anne Hathaway was great in it. What was so ironic was that when we got back to room 19, we turned the TV on to see if ER was on yet – I’LL GET TO THAT IN A MINUTE – and The Princess Diaries was on Lifetime.

Seriously.

Thankfully, we got to bed at a decent time – unaware that I was missing Conan – but we still had enough sleep to get up in time for me to get back to go to this Sustainability Summit at UPS. However, I only stayed for the keynote speaker. I didn’t feel like sounding like an idiot trying to talk to people who actually came because they wanted to. I went to this thing for a grade – and that’s it. I have to go again tomorrow to give a presentation tomorrow. Oh joyous occasion!

OKAY NOW TO MY TV FRIENDS.

ER. OH. MY. GOD.

Dr. Carter is back and it makes me so happy! But he has fucking cancer. Cancer? CANCER! And here I thought that ER was going to end it’s phenomenal 15 year run happily. George Clooney’s gonna come back to make an appearance, so it has to be kinda happy. Seeing Dr. Ross’s face again would make anyone happy. Dr. Carter can’t die. Then there would have been no reason for him to come back to County. I would have been just as satisfied if he didn’t come back than if he did and then DIED.

Someone who also CANNOT DIE is Izzie. Isobel Stevens, you stupid lovesick doctor – all those amazing times having sex with a ghost was only a figment of your fucked-up brain. You’re sick. Tell someone. Tell Alex. Tell George. Give George a reason to be on the show, because right now he’s such a secondary character it’s ridiculous. I don’t blame T.R. Knight for wanting to get out, because he doesn’t get more than 5 minutes on screen anymore, and it’s depressing, because he’s always been my favorite character.

He should just quit and go be happy with his fetus.

Seriously, Mark Cornelson is like 20. And T.R. is 35. But they’re cute. Age is only a number.

Grey’s Anatomy has been making me so mad lately, because it’s almost like when Shonda Rhimes has an idea for a character, she puts all the other storylines on either hold or repeat. When Mer and Derek were having issues with their serial killer patient, Izzie was having sex with a non-existent Denny for episodes at a time. That story went on WAY too long. And Alex doesn’t even matter anymore. George doesn’t even matter. Cristina almost doesn’t matter without Meredith. And Izzie, is…well, Shonda is paying Katie Heigl back for saying that she didn’t have the material to submit her name for Emmy consideration last year. Either they had the plan to give her the most material to work with, or give her the most fucked up storyline that ever existed on television.

This makes me sad, that my show is going down in depressing, sappy, ridiculous flames. But I can’t abandon them now. I won’t. Like Alex once said, “they’re just going through a bad patch.”

And I hope desperately that the bad patch is almost over. At least I just found out that the final three episodes of Pushing Daisies will play at the PaleyFest09 in Cali this year. I’ll have to find an illegal copy after they air in April. And Flight of the Conchords is still good. As is 30 Rock. And Lost. And American Idol is here, finally getting to the talent.

And Conan’s final episode at 30 Rockerfeller Plaza is tonight. So watch it. And record it. I’ll be sad, but Conan will be back in LA on June 1st. I hope Jimmy Fallon doesn’t bomb.

That was a really long post. But I’ll leave you with something funny.

Oh, and I should probably explain what the hell money has to do with groins.

I was asleep in the car on the way to Port Townsend yesterday, and as I was half waking up, Mom and Libby were discussing Libby diving more for balls in volleyball, and my mom said she’d pay Libby to dive, and I swear I heard her talk about paying her to do the splits too, so I woke up in almost a tourettes moment and said “money doesn’t mean anything if you break your groin!” in direct response to Mom’s remark about the splits.

I’m kinda special. XD

That’s AWESOME.

As is this. Lykki Li – Breaking it Up.

❤ Abby

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